Clem's Online Shop

Only the best from the web to you!

Free shipping (only if your name starts with a double "Z", have one leg shorter than the other, and live in the same building my shop)


Pharmacy Department specials
35% off (from the regular price which is 250% more than a real shop)

The toothpaste for today's smart set

Feel better after "Wack off"



Maybe you have

Use after you do No. 2

Dunno if it means the same in Espaniol

Suitable for most baby-faced
adults as well

Not advisable to shit on your pillow

I think it means you can try

  Gourmet Food Department
    Our very best selection of ring-of-fire sauces for you
    Material Safety Data Sheets (MSDS) available for each sauce


The prof is from the
University of Ashollandia

Another smouldering sphincter academic

The daring can try the Black Rectum iteration (red merely means irritation but black means permanent damage)

You wont be popular with whoever washes the sheets


Underpants danger



Professor of Asstrology

Recipes #5 to 9 have been banned in most civilized nations

Wine & Beer Department

Fits D'Arse

It's torn

Weight challenged

When it comes to liquor there's a lot of fixation on the genitals

What did I tell you?


A boast for toasting



For that surprise party

It stinks

Ask an Aussie what
root means



Poultry appendage

Don't confuse with imitation mule piss


Sundries Department

For that old time taste


They don't just flush it away
Bottled fresh for you

More usually a receptacle for
depositing hot fluids

Can't imagine how enough is collected

An ice pack may help


Must be a lot of camels with high-pitched
voices as a result

Those don't look like mammaries

Guaranteed to be al dente

A happy ending

Save your hand from calluses

For those times you need to give
things a good scrub
We cater for all lifestyle persuasions

We hear you . . . no need to swear

Don't blame us if you get slapped

Go eat somethin' else if you're not a whore

Avian gonads?



26 Feb 2021






Created by Clem Kuek